How would keeping toxic people in your life be a sign of anything but self worth? That's a clear cut indicator. Low self-worth is directly tied with fear and a sense of obligation. Also, with the job thing, of course your circumstances in part lead to that, but I stand on my statement. If you thought you had skills that were valuable enough to make more, why would you choose a low paying job. I am honestly just not a big fan of the soft approach because these are very tough and sobering realizations that are necessary to change. Real compassion is telling people what they need to know, not what they want to hear.